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people pleasing counselling

People Pleasing

people pleasing counselling

In its essence, wanting to please others isn't inherently negative; it's a desire to connect with others, to be supportive, and to feel valued. It's an expression of empathy and kindness, a way to nurture relationships and foster harmony. Like a gentle breeze smoothing the waters of human interaction or sunlight illuminating the path to understanding, people-pleasing motivates us to build connections and embrace compassion, fostering empathy and trust along the way.

However, there's a fine line between genuine kindness and overwhelming self-sacrifice. When the need to please becomes relentless—leading us to constantly put others' needs before our own, eroding our boundaries, and neglecting self-care—its once-noble intentions transform into a source of stress and self-neglect. In these moments, the weight of pleasing others dims our own sense of self. The incessant need for approval clouds our self-worth, and even simple interactions feel like navigating treacherous terrain. Quality of life may suffer as the quest for acceptance tightens its grip.

Even though people-pleasing is a natural part of our human experience, it doesn't mean you have to face it alone. That's where I come in. Let me support you in understanding these patterns, finding healthier approaches, and moving forward with self-compassion and balance. You're not alone—let's embark on this journey together.

Do any of these sound familiar? 

  • I often say yes to requests even when I’m already overwhelmed, fearing that saying no will disappoint others.

  • I prioritize others' needs and desires over my own, often neglecting my own well-being in the process.

  • I struggle to assert my own opinions and preferences, going along with what others want to keep the peace.

  • I feel guilty and anxious when I take time for myself, believing I should always be available to help others.

  • I avoid conflict at all costs, even when it means suppressing my true feelings and needs.

  • I find it difficult to accept criticism, as I equate it with a failure to meet others' expectations and a loss of their approval.

  • I often apologize excessively, even for things that aren’t my fault, to smooth over potential disagreements or discomfort.

  • I get anxious about how others perceive me, overanalyzing my interactions to ensure I haven’t offended or disappointed anyone.

  • I struggle to set and maintain boundaries, often allowing others to take advantage of my willingness to help.

  • I find it difficult to make decisions without first considering how they will affect or be perceived by others.

  • I often engage in self-sacrificing behavior, putting my own needs and desires on hold to cater to others.

  • I experience emotional exhaustion and burnout from constantly trying to meet everyone else's expectations and demands.

  • I feel a constant need to be liked and accepted by everyone, which leads me to conform and suppress my authentic self.

  • I often feel like I’m walking on eggshells, afraid of inadvertently upsetting or disappointing those around me.

  • I struggle with feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem, as my self-worth is tied to others' approval and validation.

  • I frequently put myself in uncomfortable or inconvenient situations to avoid saying no or displeasing someone.


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